Lean Into God

Christmastime can be a difficult time for many who may have lost a loved one or are separated from family members for one reason or another. As a divorced father, I have experienced the loneliest of times on Christmas, feeling isolated and alone, knowing the ones I love are engaged in social merriment elsewhere. These are the times to lean into God.

Many households suffer with the pain of missing loved ones who have passed away, estranged family members or the stress of attending gatherings that include people that have caused dissention or conflict among relatives. All too often we compare our situations with the “ideal holiday” and set ourselves up for disappointment when things don’t measure up.

We can become oppressed by our own expectations, leading to anxiety and depression. For some reason, the wrongs of the past tend to surface during Christmas or other holidays when one party or another withholds or limits interactions with family.

The common denominator surrounding all of this is the fallibility of people. When we place our hope in people, we risk the inevitability of disappointment. Life is unfair and people are unjust. If it is justice we seek than we can only look to God because He alone is just (Deuteronomy 32:4).

FOCUS ON JESUS

Rather than allowing the storm to distract us and undermine our well being, let us focus on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith. Matthew 14:22-33 describes the dynamics at play when Jesus walked upon the water. Peter asked Him to summon him to walk on the water also.

“‘Come’, He said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, ‘Lord, save me!’ Immediately Jesus reached out His hand and caught him. ‘You of little faith,’ He said, ‘why did you doubt?'”

The storms of life are temporary and the troubles we encounter don’t have to define us. Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33). Not one of our troubles will accompany us to the grave. None of our tears will follow us beyond the grave.

In Luke 12:25, Jesus says, “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?” Its okay to grieve over loved ones who are separated from us, but we don’t have to be overcome by grief. We must not allow despair to consume us. “For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.” (2 Timothy 1:7).

It helps if we recognize that our lamentations may be considered blessings to someone else. The family that frustrates us may be the dream of an only child or those unable to have children. The food on our table is the dream of someone who is starving. The water from our tap may be the desire for those without water. The roof over our heads is the dream of those who are homeless. The aches and pains we struggle with might be welcomed by someone with a terminal disease.

Helping those less fortunate can be a therapeutic way of coping with the anxiety of holidays as well. Helping at a food bank or serving at a soup kitchen can be a blessing as you bless others. The inmates I call on in prison ministry may not get other visitors during the holidays or the elderly in senior’s centers may be ignored by those they long to see. They welcome the interaction.

When we bless others we receive blessings in return. Proverbs 11:25 teaches that, “A generous person will prosper, whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.” It is better to give than to receive and when we give, we give to God. The Bible says, “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” (Matthew 25:40).

Consider the actions of Jesus, knowing that He would be betrayed into the hands of the Romans, after the last supper; He washed the feet of the disciples and said, “I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.” (John 12:15).

Paul advises in Philippians 2:3-4, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others.”

Jesus taught that the first will be last and the last will be first (Matthew 20:16). He made Himself low and now His name is the name above all names (Philippians 2:9). He set the template for Christian living and promised that those who follow Him will receive eternal life. So it is not for glory in this life that we strive, but through faith that we cling to the promise of glory in the life to come.

Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 15:19, “If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are of all people most to be pitied.” And in Romans 8:18 he penned, “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us,”.

OUR FAITH IS IN GOD

So take heart, all who are feeling alone and abandoned. Our faith is in God, who incarnated in Christ and lived the very same emotional and physical challenges we are facing. King David speaks to us who are hurting through Psalm 34:18. “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

Jesus is no stranger to pain and He understands our affliction (Hebrews 4:15). Our despair may deprive us of the enjoyment of many holidays without those we love, but nothing can separate us from the love of God that is in Christ (Romans 8:35-39).

In the song In Christ Alone (My Hope Is Found), the writer concludes with the words, “No power of hell, no scheme of man, can ever pluck me from His hand, till He returns or calls me home, here in the power of Christ I’ll stand.” May this be our creed as followers of Jesus. May the judgements of others never prosper over us.

The words of Paul in 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 resonate through the generations: “Therefore do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”

And King David’s Psalm 121:1-2 proclaims, “I lift my eyes to the mountains – where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.” Even though he was a man after God’s own heart, he experienced discouragement and sorrow. He cried out to God and sought shelter in His presence, and wrote, “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” (Psalm 46:1).

Perhaps we were not invited to the family Christmas gathering because we weren’t considered worthy due to our lack of material wealth or because we don’t measure up to someone’s arbitrary standard of merit. Have courage, we possess great value in God’s sight (Matthew 6:26, Luke 12:6-7).

In our own brokenness, we eventually will come to terms with the fact that we cannot discover true peace without God’s help. Help that is freely given to those who ask in humility and peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7). We may have been excluded by controlling and manipulative people, but we are not destined to remain marginalized.

Peter succinctly sums up how we ought to lean into God in 1 Peter 5:6-7, “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for You.” When we are at our lowest and have nothing but God, we discover that God is all we need.